On Tuesday when I was browsing at the bookstore, I ended up looking at book titles the entire time. I usually stop and read something, but I ended up scanning, picking up books and looking at the back cover and seeing what people are writing about these days. I saw rows and rows of books written by middle eastern women, at the front of the store. I wanted to read each and every one of those books. I also saw that in the biography section, people will write about ANYthing these days. Someone got screwed over by their husband? I guess other people want to read about it. The woman who raised music producer/rapper Kanye West? We might want to hear her story. I saw a book that appeared to be written by someone my age, with my circumstances, talking about how she lived a carefree life and then chose to become a mommy. It looked like it would be a great commentary about the road less travelled. She said that she had been living the life that so many women have chosen to live these days, to be a daughter instead of a mother. To wonder instead of know. Right about there was where she lost me as an interested reader. I thought she was going to talk about the advantages of both sides, you know? As if everyone who hasn’t had a kid just wonders. I was bummed too, because here I thought there was someone I could relate to.
I mean, even now, I find myself wishing I had someone to read Dr. Seuss to, and whose room I could decorate like LaLa land. Or play with Tonka Trucks with. Among SO many other things that I would do. I also find myself enjoying the freedom more than I ever have, because now, with my twenties behind me, I also have [most of] the angst behind me. I can spend an entire evening walking along the beach in Malibu by myself, if I so choose. Or take off for the weekend without having to make any arrangements or pack for a whole brood.
There’s potential for wondering on either path. The attitude that women are missing out until they have kids was addressed as far back in the feminist movement as Erica Jong’s “Fear of Flying”, when her sister was pounding on her to get with the program and start having babies. What about the women who don’t? Are they going to suffer from a deficiency, at the end of their lives?
I was also loving the history section, like I always do. In the section on South American History, there’s an entire book about cocaine. There’s an entire chapter dedicated to crack cocaine, it’s history, and all the “why’s” you’ve ever wanted to ask. Freebasing? It means just freeing the base elements in cocaine, and letting them drift upwards in a vapor and into your lungs.
I did not know that.
And with all the free time I have, I can freebase all the crack cocaine I want, because now I know how. In fact I can do that all weekend.
I really should get out and check out books more often.