My roommate got an Emmy! The Amazing Race won for best reality show contest, and so she got an Emmy for producer. I checked it out yesterday morning at 3 a.m. in all its dangerously spiky glory. Two feet south of it was my roommate. She was sitting on the floor, leaning all the way forward with her face stuck in a small trashcan, vomiting her brains out. It looked so funny, because her hands weren’t even involved in the ordeal. I think they were just splayed out to the sides. Her date had decided to come get me at yes 3 a.m. because, it turned out, he didn’t think she would be comfortable sleeping in her dress. We got her pukey hair pinned back from her face and then I wrestled her into her pajamas, and she decided to sleep exactly where I found her. Her date, the human alarm clock, also woke me up from my nap later on that day, after I got home from work, to say he was sorry for waking me up earlier.
So somewhere in there I got caught up enough on sleep to wake up and go take a pic of her statue, which she said she accidentally poked somebody from the cast of Heroes with. And then she told that person that it shouldn’t hurt, because they’re invincible. Aww. She and her date are so nice to people. So yeah, now both of my roommates have media awards. Brian’s is an Academy Award. But can they walk in 8 inch platform heels? Because I can. And I think I’m going to have my heels bronzed so I can put them on the mantel next to my roommates’ trophies.
The coolest thing from her night was the gift bag she got from the Entertainment Tonight party. It was a designer bag, filled to the rim with chocolates, lotions, candles and makeup, and somewhere in there she got a great Italian Cookbook that I’ll totally be taking over on. She looks great, too, in spite of the hangover. I need to find out where she gets her skin done because I mean, she’s glowing. I would look like a chemo patient if I was that hungover. It must be the new Emmy.
Cris, don’t sleep with this on that shelf above your bed. I’m going to have nightmares about earthquakes.