If you can’t stand the heat

There’s a reason we struggle.  The reasons are out there in front of us like neon signs, when we look at people who don’t have to struggle through the basics in life and instead have them handed to them.  Struggling builds character.  More than that though, it keeps us connected with each other on a base level.  We all have to work at building and keeping what we have, and without the struggle it would have so much less meaning, if any at all.  My day to day life has been a bit of an ordeal lately, since I find myself in the company of a staggering amount of social naivety sometimes.  I want to help, but you can’t actually reach into someone’s head and connect the neurons that haven’t found each other, and aren’t going to.  Compassion?  That’s a bit alien to me.  I have compassion for animals, and maybe kids.  With grown people, I have to reach for it.   I have to  literally talk myself through how lucky I am to have the friendships that I have, and remind myself that these are the proof that I was born with the equipment that it takes to build and hold onto real relationships with people.  In fact I have a huge amount of this, and it takes work. Work and integrity.  And the basic skills to know when to shut one’s God damned mouth.  On top of that, I have this kick ass family.  Not everybody has that.  So if I have to stop and remind myself of this every time I have to summon up the patience to be in the proximity of the less equipped, while in the middle of licking my wounds, then I’d still say I got the better deal in life, by a landslide.

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